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Fucking obvious idea

You know those 5G petitions? Think hard about who wants you to be distracted from fixing the very real and very known harms. Who wants you to mistrust science, and to be divided as a society? Exactly. Fuck those people.

This 5G stuff is the divisive distraction propaganda certain bad-actors want us to be distracted by.

Any harmful effects of 5G will be far far outweighed by their benefits from efficiency gains and automation.

Any harmful effects of 5g are far far far far less harmful than known negative effects of many other artefacts of contemporary life and industry upon which we would be better served to focus our attention.

Think hard about who wants you to be distracted from fixing the big issues, to mistrust science, and to be divided as a society.

Right? I mean of-fucking-course it’s those guys trying to fuck with us AGAIN.

Fuck those people.

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Fucking obvious idea

Should we drop our unhelpful friends? Probably not. Though… one does have to be pretty ignorant / stupid / fucked up NOT to have joined the dots by now; or to have joined the dots but be exploiting the moment.

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Fucking obvious idea

Peeing in the shower once a day saves 2,500 litres of water per year per person

This assumes you are having a shower once per day anyway. If not, maybe pee in the sink, or in the garden if you have one.

Or you could just follow the “if it’s yellow it’s mellow” rule and not flush.

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Fucking obvious idea

Make recycling bins the same shape, and make the bags the same fucking colour.

Enraging as it most certainly is to see someone throw non-recycling in a recycling bin, it’s hardly fucking surprising. There’s no standardisation. The bins all look different, the bags are all different colours, the locations are inconsistent — it’s almost designed to be difficult.

Which is weird.

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Fucking obvious idea

Leave your fucking eyebrows alone.

Unless you have a Freda Kahlo monobrow and want to ‘make a statement’,

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Fucking obvious idea

Don’t eat so much fucking cheese.

It consumes massively disproportionate amounts of resource and makes you fat and spotty. Some cheese is good. Lots of cheese is bad. A bit less cheese is perfect.

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Fucking obvious idea

This is a fucking great lyric: “The cars in the church yard are shiny and German – distinctly at odds with the theme of the sermon.”

That, my friends, is Mr Neil Hannon of The Divine Comedy. It tells you pretty much everything you need to know about organised religion: it’s 99% self-protecting tribal cult, and 1% universal love.

If Jesus hadn’t risen from the dead he’d be spinning is his grave so much we could strap a few magnets to his skeleton, stick him inside a coil, and power a few large cities.*

* If you don’t get this joke, you didn’t pay enough attention at school.

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Fucking obvious idea

Use a fucking spatula.

A fuck of a lot of effort went into getting that food this far. Don’t fuck it up now.

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Fucking obvious idea

Create an energy-intensive get-rich-quick currency so humanity’s inexhaustible greed drives it to build ENORMOUS renewable energy systems. Then upgrade its algorithm to be super efficient.

Bitcoin uses a fuckton of energy for some stupid/clever reason. But a wise man once said to me that if you have an idea which relies on people being stupid or greedy, it will be a winner. This might be exactly what we need to get people building solar plants really fucking quickly.

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Fucking obvious idea

If a person’s time on facebook is greater than their time outside there will be Woe and Despair. If time outside is greater than that on facebook there will be Redemption for One and Salvation for All.