“The adverts, the buying, the unfulfilling bullshit, the stupid fucking twats who take mindless stupid fucking decisions every fucking day, the commute, the noise, the hassle, all the sitting down, all the nonsense and gibberish, and this fucking shit we do day in, day out. How the fuck did it come to this? Fuck it. I’ve just quit this stupid fucking job and am going to do something MEANINGFUL.”
What an email to receive! We’d cheer, stand on chairs, salute, and rejoice! You fucking go, you big red fire-engine! Send us postcards! You have put meaning into our lives already! FULL-FUCKING-SPEED AHEAD!!
But sadly no one’s send us an email like this… yet. Might you be the first?
UPDATE – We just received this, which is, in many ways, an altogether better type of email to receive:
I’d fucking love to send you an email telling you that I’ve had it up to fucking here with my miserable daily existence,
but I can’t.
While I was riding my bike to my fucking relaxed and decent job, I thought maybe my dumb fucking friends – who have shit lives trying to make more fucking money to please someone who’s selling them shit they don’t need – might see my picturesque fucking life and realise that theirs isn’t really worth… well… any-fucking-thing at all.
But so far they haven’t. Fucking muppets.
So since I can’t send you an email explaining my fucking epiphany, I thought I would send you one telling you this instead. Have a great fucking day.