All 443 Ideas

Make the fucking weather forecast like the shipping forecast. Location. Temperature. Wind. Rain. Done.
It rains 150 days a year. Take a fucking umbrella.
Fuck printing money for war. Print money for peace.
You know those 5G petitions? Think hard about who wants you to be distracted from fixing the very real and very known harms. Who wants you to mistrust science, and to be divided as a society? Exactly. Fuck those people.
Should we drop our unhelpful friends? Probably not. Though... one does have to be pretty ignorant / stupid / fucked up NOT to have joined the dots by now; or to have joined the dots but be exploiting the moment.
Peeing in the shower once a day saves 2,500 litres of water per year per person
Make recycling bins the same fucking shape, and make the bags the same fucking colour.
Leave your fucking eyebrows alone.
Don't eat so much fucking cheese.
This is a fucking great lyric: "The cars in the church yard are shiny and German - distinctly at odds with the theme of the sermon."
Use a fucking spatula.
Create an energy-intensive get-rich-quick currency so humanity's inexhaustible greed drives it to build ENORMOUS renewable energy systems. Then upgrade its algorithm to be super efficient.
If a person's time on facebook is greater than their time outside there will be Woe and Despair. If time outside is greater than that on facebook there will be Redemption for One and Salvation for All.
Terrorist = stupid wasp. Bull = stung politician. Everything you cherish but take for granted = china shop.
No terrorist has ever overturned my human rights, taken away my freedom, or demanded access to all my communications.
How to make a Progressive Alliance actually fucking work
Be a decent fucking human being.
Fuck Brexit.
Fake news didn't lose the election. Not being able to tell the fucking difference did.
News is not entertainment. It can be entertaining, accessible, interesting, and funny. But it is NOT enterfuckingtainment.
You know how right now you're waiting for the aliens to arrive and tell us to get our fucking shit together or else?
Like going to coffee shops? Then take a fucking mug with you.
Nothing is fucking binary.
Talk to your friends about anthropogenic climate change, peak oil, modern democracies, and sustainable economic models. If you don't, Rupert Murdoch will.
P2P Tamagotchi healthcare.
Let people arriving in the country help themselves to all the stuff they fucking confiscate when you go through customs.
Fuck you, social media media bubble, for giving us false hope.
Things like the EU magicing £834,000,000,000 into existence to give to fucking banks makes me want to tear my fucking eyeballs out.
Winter = porridge. It fucking rocks.
Get a fucking hobby.
The pen is mightier than the sword. But the sword really nailed the business model thing, which rather undermines the pen. Fuck modern economics.
<a href="http://www.unfrack.me">Unfrack yourself</a>
Anyone who has more than three uninsulated properties by 2016 has them nationalised.
"This combustible mixture of ignorance and power is going to blow up in our faces."
"Jade Rabbit" is a fucking great name for a spacecraft.
It would cost only $0.07 per day to make coffee completely fucking awesome.
No matter how well you play musical chairs, it's still a shit game in which most people lose.
Fracking is powered by 98% of Britons. (NOT the other way around.)
More fucking swings.
Paint wind turbines to look like flowers
Escape the fucking city.
We must remember our duty to Nature before it is too late. That duty is constant. It is never completed. It lives on as we breathe. It endures as we eat and sleep, work and rest, as we are born and as we pass away.
Every premature death is a tragedy.
A basic fucking income
The peaceful populations of North Korea, Israel, Pakistan, and Iran might like to get their shit together into a velvet revolution right about now.
You have to stop being wrong before setting the world to rights.
Try not to fly.
What incredible shit we put up with most of our lives. The domestic routine. The stupid and useless and degrading jobs. The insufferable arroagance of elected officials. The crafty cheating and slimy advertising of the businessman. The tedious wars in which we kill our buddies instead of our real enemies back home in the capital. The foul diseased and hideous cities and towns we live in. The constant petty tyranny of automatic washers, and automobiles,and TVs and telephones. Oh Christ what intolerable garbage and utterly useless crap we bury ourselves in day by day.
The very fact that the word 'misanthropy' exists is quite a statement.
Egypt: have a National Day of Psychonautics and then hurry up and write your constitution. It'll be fucking brilliant and you can show the world that a renaissance built on peace, love, forgiveness, and togetherness is not only possible but incredibly potent.
Regulate the press, food industry, banks, energy companies, rail companies, utility companies, and every one else who does important work which they seem to fuck up if left to their own devices.
Fuck fairy tales. Make happy endings come true in reality. Please.
Play God. Especially on Sundays when (s)he rested.
333 years. That's how long we'd have to run Comic Relief to pay for ONE nuclear submarine. Government irresponsibility is not funny.
Pull both zips on your backpack around to one side, not together at the top.
If you're an idiot, don't go out if it's snowing.
Fuck for the forest.
Fuck Wonga.
Let ME decide when to open the fucking washing machine door.
I'm pretty fucking certain that Oscar Pistorius does not need to be headline fucking news for a whole fucking week.
Take the power back.
Say "I love you" more often. And show it more often than you say it.
He's the fucking Pope. Of COURSE he's been abusing his position of power.
"We will fix it"
"Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change" - which is almost nothing, you and I are damned near unstoppable.
Straight or gay, we're all getting fucked by inaction on renewables & sustainability.
Fucking told you so.
“The world is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper”
Put "Do not use ______" post-it notes on dumb things.
Ask the right fucking question.
Fuck Molotovs, throw snowballs!
Work a bit fucking less.
Get fit. Meet people. Go places. Have fun.
Be fucking vigilant.
Remember that Jesus had so much less to get fucked off about.
Punish parents for taking children to hospital.
There is no fucking reality but action.
Do not step back and to the right. Join hands and step forward.
If you're going to eat beef, eat only grass-fed beef.
God hates flags.
Don't fucking kill each other.
Fuck labels. Approach each other as humans and make friends.
Prise the dial off thermostats and stick them back on a few degrees to the left.
Donate to Wikipedia.
Our climate is changing. And while the increase in extreme weather we have experienced in New York City and around the world may or may not be the result of it, the risk that it might be – given this week’s devastation – should compel all elected leaders to take immediate action.
Thank you, America!
IMPORTANT NEW VOTING LAWS: THOSE THAT ARE PLANNING TO VOTE REPUBLICAN ARE TO VOTE ON WEDNESDAY AND DEMOCRATIC VOTERS ARE VOTING TUESDAY. DO NOT APPEAR ON THE WRONG DAY AS YOUR VOTE MAY BE COUNTED INCORRECTLY IF YOU APPEAR ON THE WRONG DAY. DEMOCRATIC=TUESDAY REPUBLICAN=WEDNESDAY PLEASE REPOST AND SPREAD THE WORD
"When will we take climate change seriously? F*cking politicians and their bullshit!" ♥ My Mom.
Fuck Section 5
Follow your God, not his* leaders.
Switch off the X-Factor, step outside, and go see some real fucking talent.
Don't judge me. Buy tickets.
It's all about getting laid. Use your power wisely, women.
If a fossil fuel extraction company is paying your bills, you're fucking sick.
If you work for the bad guys, quit your fucking job today.
We know that as a species, we are hitting the limits, in resources, pollution, and our impact on the natural world. We know that exponential growth in a closed system is dangerous. We know that we must reduce the impact of our society immediately or face widespread systemic failure. As makers and entrepreneurs, our task is to make these constraints work for us, and use our creativity to deliver progress without the costs we previously accepted as a side effect of our work. We have very little time, but we have an incredibly powerful tool at our disposal. We have to apply the power of the web to make change happen at all levels of society, transforming businesses, governments, and citizens on a massive scale. Beginning today, we will dedicate ourselves to this mission. We will work on projects with true meaning, that make the future a better place to be, rather than creating illusory short-term value. We hope you will join us. We have a lot of work to do.
Make the lift slower than the stairs.
Rave police.
Everything is a fucking remix.
PUBLIC ≠ PUBIC.
Your work and your life are not separate things. Take some fucking responsibility for you actions.
Hey SalesForce, Apple, Monsanto! GRAND NEWS! You can save a FORTUNE on patent and trademark applications by NOT TRYING TO OWN EVERY SINGLE FUCKING THING.
If any change is imposed on a system in equilibrium, the system will change in such a way as to counteract the imposed change.
No GM food until they've got GM algae photosynthesing oil or hydrogen more efficiently than we can dig it out of the ground.
If you don't buy recycled, you're not fucking recycling.
Share the fuck out of this shit.
Include the fucking demos in the democracy.
Get on your mother fucking bike, y'all.
Pay more for your fucking food.
Put safe cycle routes on Google Maps. (Wish granted, 11 July 2012)
Do what makes you happy only some of the time. Do what makes us better with the rest of it.
Adapt to your surroundings.
I am establishing myself as a bank. I am then going to loan you pretend money, but ask for real money back again. When I realise I've spent all your real money, I'm going to make more pretend money. And you'll accept that because you're too busy needing to make some real money for me to stop and think.
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts.
Bob fucking Diamond.
Boycott America.
What the fuck has Occupy done so far?
Airships don't need runways. Think ahead, people, think ahead.
How to solve climate change? Stop fucking funding it.
Go back to bed.
Just put 10 trillion fucking euros in to the banks, realise that 'the markets' STILL aren't happy, realise you're playing in to their greedy little hands, renege on all your debts, and start using a triple-bottom-line accounting system based on the ability of the planet to support life.
More potatoes, less bread.
Let the Oyster cards pay for Boris bikes.
"Too big to fail" didn't work for T.Rex, the Third Reich, or Gaddafi.
Drop seeds not bombs.
Celebrating the reign of an annoyingly un-vocal figurehead every 10 years may seem weird, until you remember what people do for god.
Print your own money.
400 parts per fucking million is NOT a good fucking idea.
Money is just a fucking idea. We invented it to help us, and now we are subjugated by it. Let's re-invent it, but let's be smart this time, k?
Global advertising spend is $498 billion. We don't need that shit.
Are you in your 50s or 60s? There has been a 28% decline in species since 1970. That was your watch. Please stop with the denial bullshit.
Reality is fucking scary.
Be fucking awesome for 100 years.
NEWSFLASH!! Technology is no longer holding us back STOP We have reached abundance STOP Our most critical problems require only social solutions STOP
Don't give money to banks, give money directly to big, sensible projects.
Chill the fuck out.
Solve the problem, not the symptom.
Sugar AND a stick to stir? Why not just make the stirrer out of sugar? Fucking GENIUS.
The UK is in recession largely because WE'RE MEASURING THE WRONG FUCKING STUFF.
Recycle. Save the world. Get laid.
Just fucking commit.
For every child born, plant a tree.
If you don't wear a helmet, carry a donor card.
You're more likely to get laid if you wear a bike helmet when you cycle.
Stop doing businesses with people who only print on one side.
Run it by me first, k?
________ is / are so 20th century.
Fuck spies, hackers, and home secretaries before they fuck you.
Whisky, guns, girls, treehouses.
Make organic the default.
Fridays are Strike days.
KONY2012 style whip-around to fund a team of mercenaries to sort out Syria.
EU blocks copyright reform with a voter turnout of 113%. In a room of 23 people.
Cultivate randomness. Live a life of discipline, but do not be afraid of disorder.
Hey, Richard Branson, I thought you were supposed to be a fucking dude?
The archbishops do protest too much, methinks.
Fix the problem.
Read what follows.
Surely I should be able to turn the fucking shower on and off WITHOUT getting wet?
Diversity is about more than Gods, sexy bits, and skin colour.
Sustainable food and renewable energy.
It's not shit, it's chocolate ice-cream! Lap it up, suckers!
Cross your fingers, Britain.
Stop looking at the fucking speedometer and look where we're going, because we left the road a while ago.
Even if you COULD reach the top of the hamster wheel, what would you do when you got there?
Abdandon fucking ship.
Rank countries by their sustainability, not by their fucking credit rating.
Yes, that was a bit fucking harsh, wasn't it?
Smile.
How can leaders warn of a grim 2012? We have people, resources, need, opportunity, desire - what the fuck are we lacking exactly?
Striking when you've a noble grievance is inspiring. Striking at Christmas or New Year every single fucking year makes you looks like a bunch of selfish, moronic cunts.
2012. There is a renaissance coming. Be ready, be informed, be useful.
As of today, the days are getting longer. The new year has just begun. 2012 is on the doorstep... let's go and make it fucking epic!
Is all we lack a credible sounding -ism?
Give up. It's not fucking worth it.
Fuck FIFA.
This game is completely fucking shit. Everyone loses. Fuck that. Let's play a better game.
Why the fuck am I not striking today?
Try to minimise suffering, not maximise happiness.
If we didn't get raped, we wouldn't need rape counselling.
Wake the fuck up.
If I hear one more politician talk about 'the need for growth', I'm going to fucking scream.
Money is fucking ridiculous.
Remove hedgehogs before lighting bonfires.
Let Greece do what the fuck it wants.
Don't let your city release dangeous cyclopaths.
Make being gay a crime.
Stop. Collaborate. And Listen.
Rules? Fuck the rules.
Go and occupy something. And if you don't learn something, teach.
Speak the truth, even if your voice shakes.
Embrace uncertainty and hope for the best.
Don't fuck hospitals. Fucking nurses is still OK.
Occupy London.
Just print the fucking file in a colour you do have then, printer.
Make Ecocide the 5th international crime against peace.
Make it fucking simpler.
Fuck working. Life's too short for that shit.
Disconnect from the mains.
Taxing wealthier people more makes them, and us, a lot fucking happier.
Let's just make Palenstine a fucking state and move on, can we?
Get other people involved.
Practise being happy.
Slow down so you can realise what's fucked and what's not.
Sit upright and think good thoughts.
Go and play.
Stop the fucking arms fair.
Money sure as hell fucks things up.
Unlimited sustainable energy.
Don't be a fucking banker.
Half the amount of tea in tea bags.
Do what the fuck you like.
We humans who art on Earth, humanity is special. Our kingdom has come: Do what we innately know to be right on earth, because that's all there is. Share the bread we have, try not to screw up, when others screw up, understand. We can't have everything that tempts us. Deliver ourselves from evil because this is it: the Earth, the power to do right - and the glory to come if we do - is ours, now and forever, Hu-man.
Human civilisation has only a 50% chance of surviving the next century THAT IS UN-FUCKING-ACCEPTABLE.
Make a shopping list, buy less crap.
Eat more, exercise less.
Teach animals the need for economic growth.
Donations are fucking brilliant, but DO nations are fucking inspiring.
Trains are a fucking public service, not a public fucking service.
Stop talking and fucking do something.
Demand to eat more fucking GM.
Read different newspapers.
Go to the beach.
Don't fight back, move on.
Don't base your economic system on the fucking Doozers from Fraggle Rock.
If you're going to riot, make it fucking mean something.
Kill a stupid person.
Fuck livestock.
Make some fucking lovely ginger beer!
What the fuck? No way!
Fuck war.
They're not "emerging markets", they're people with their own mission, which hopefully won't include further catastrophic fucking corporatism.
Cash in on the feed-in tariff before the stupid fuckers stop it.
Money is just a fucking concept. If it keeps on failing, then fucking redesign it!
Put criminal records online for all violent, sexual, and other high impact crimes.
Solar fucking panels.
Revel in the misfortunes of others.
Chillax, homes!
Scrap visas.
Unplug.
Hey, Buffett - rather than giving $1.78bn to various foundations, how about just not fucking taking it all in the first place?
Find a new fucking planet, because I can't take this shit any more.
Exercise your fucking rage.
Tell your friends.
If you ever buy the News of the World again, you're a fucking idiot.
Get out of fucking debt.
Fuck these greedy strike-mongering fuckers
Cut pollution by making factories put their outlets upstream of their inlets.
Run.
Bring back the Drachma. And the Franc, the Schilling, and all the rest.
Ask your MEP for more pollution
ARGH FUCK!! What the fuck are we playing at?
Don't use a fucking tumble drier.
Turn off the fucking TV.
A crank is a piece of simple technology that creates revolutions.
Take some fucking responsibility.
Leave everyone just a little bit happier.
Bless the pomodoro.
Take joy in your work and savour the bliss of leisure.
How you make your livelihood is absolutely fucking vital.
Don't be a jerk. Be fucking AWESOME!
Don't fuck fish.
Go by bike.
Economic development not economic growth.
Appreciate life.
Rain. Forest.
Fuck supermarkets.
If you don't like your job, or you're shit at it, quit.
Tell us which journalists you've slept with.
Accept things just the way they are.
Build a fake Trident.
Fart loudly. It's funny.
If I want to die, that's really none of your fucking business.
Create an economic infrastrucutre which accurately values all the things we value.
Expect the best, but brace yourself for a harsh kicking from a fucking ruthless reality.
Pretend you're a fucking wise, old zen guru with the perspective, wisdom, and patience of a god.
Change change.
Have more fucking national holidays.
Ask yourself if you should vote for people who think that you're too fucking stupid to list things in order of preference.
Stop telling us what the fucking twittersphere says about a subject and do your fucking job and bring me well informed comment.
Ban planned obsolescence.
Show you don't give a fuck about what other people think. Vote NO to AV.
Help stupid and / or selfish people work out how to differentiate between Needs and Wants.
Do not burn yourself out. Be as I am-a reluctant enthusiast... a part time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it. While you can. While it is still there. So get out there and mess around with your friends, ramble out yonder and explore the forests, encounter the grizz, climb the mountains. Run the rivers, breathe deep of that yet sweet and lucid air, sit quietly for a while and contemplate the precious stillness, that lovely, mysterious and awesome space. Enjoy yourselves, keep your brain in your head and your head firmly attached to your body, the body active and alive, and I promise you this much: I promise you this one sweet victory over our enemies, over those deskbound people with their hearts in a safe deposit box and their eyes hypnotized by desk calculators. I promise you this: you will outlive the bastards.
Why the fuck should we pay estate agents? They're like the fucking mafia, positioning themselves in a situation and charging everyone for doing fuck all.
Take the fucking stairs.
There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.
Share your good fucking ideas.
Be super-fucking-cool.
Hold on tightly. Let go lightly.
Your advice is fucking brilliant. Be sure to follow it yourself.
Assume the best.
If you think factory farming is a good idea, you're (1) a brutal, thoughtless, motherfucker, or (2) not in full possession of the facts.
Throw more fucking money at the problem, that's bound to fucking fix it.
Go to Tescos for fucking everything.
Don't get in or out of bed for money. Do it for fun.
Don't grow old. Identify and reconsider your assumptions and prejudices.
Tax bads, not goods.
Reinvent your life.
Think happy thoughts.
Fuck people, save animals.
More fucking bike lanes.
Avoid tax, sell bullshit, fuck over Ireland.
Ban billboard advertising and appreciate architecture again.
Sharpen your tools.
Just fucking do it.
We are now faced with the fact that tomorrow is today. We are confronted with the fierce urgency of now. There is such a thing as being too late. We may cry out desperately for time to pause in her passage, but time is adamant to every plea and rushes on. Over the bleached bones and jumbled residues of numerous civilizations are written the pathetic words, "Too late."
Fuck their reality. It's your world.
Fukushima has enough fucking cameras pointing at it. Can we please deal with the real meltdown in Libya and Bahrain, where paying attention WILL make a fucking difference?
Don't swear so fucking much.
Use plain text emails
Are you healthy? Good. Go see your Doctor.
Build more nuclear power stations.
Don't be so hung up on ownership.
Fuck cancer.
Give up something for 40 days.
Dumpster dive at your supermarket.
Go lightly. Like those dudes in Crouching Tiger.
Office workers: when you leave, TURN OFF THE FUCKING LIGHTS.
If you have the means, please kick Rupert Murdoch in the balls. Really fucking hard.
Slow the fuck down.
Eat smart
Simplify things to a point of meaninglessness, then start a newspaper.
It'll only take 10 minutes. Will it fuck.
Don't measure everything in fucking money.
Look after yourself and work together.
Save the internet, save the world.
Aren't you sick of all this fucking stuff?
Get a hobby other than drinking for fuck's sake.
Cancel the fucking debt.
If it's not resilient, it's as good as fucking useless.
Cheer the fuck up.
Admit it - at least 50% of what you do is completely fucking useless in the long run.
Valentine's day is all about good fucking ideas.
Fuck more, breed less.
Remember that 'market efficiency' is a fucking myth.
Buy organic, local food, and pay more for it. Avoid buying food in supermarkets, instead use local shops or a food co-op.
Plastic bags are fucking awesome.
Apologise.
As simple as can be but no fucking simpler.
Turn off the fucking advertising.
Economists are pussies. They ignore 66% of the problem because it's 'too hard'.
Many of the anxieties that harass you are superfluous: being but creatures of your own fancy, you can rid yourself of them and expand into an ampler region, letting your thought sweep over the entire universe, contemplating the illimitable tracts of eternity.
Just <a href="http://www.38degrees.org.uk/Jeremy-hunt-not-impartial">sign the fucking petition</a>.
Britain could be a zero-carbon country by 2030. What the fuck are we waiting for? Seriously, have you seen the fucking science? It's a big fucking scary problem but we know the solutions and we're not fucking doing them. Why the fuck not?
Grow a vegetable or two this year.
Make policies based on science, not on salesmen.
Fuck the trend.
Bicycle more.
Thrift, parsimony, & efficiency are fucking good things.
Give blood.
Being "neutral" in a crisis is a fucking joke.
Eat organic to show you give a fuck.
Stop fucking dis-integrating.
Fuck Murdoch.
Just fucking deal with it and stop fucking around.
Eat less fucking meat. And fish.
The problem is not fucking fixed until the process which caused it is fixed.
Don't fucking think, it's a waste of shopping time.
Love.
Build more fucking renewables.
Just fucking move along.
If it's not fun, it's not fucking sustainable.
Don't let your possessions possess you.
Spot the fucking patterns.
Save yourself the fucking bother.
Fuck resolutions.
Have a fucking good time.
Fuck. This. Shit.
Car pool, or hitch-hike.
Don't waste your fucking time.
Refrain from making unnecessary journeys.
Fuck Christmas.
Use a spatula. Properly.
Know thyself.
Refuse to be fucking terrorised.
Enjoy white wine in the sun.
Put receipts in with presents you give.
Surprises are fucking cool!
A wall post is not the same as a hug.
Libraries.
Have some genuinely fucking useful skills.
14 making days until Christmas!
Play life like an infinite game.
Stop spraying everything with toxic chemicals, you stupid fear-mongering fucks.
Design a banking system that is fit for purpose.
Give twice as much to charity.
Have more fucking sunshine.
Use more stuff.
Make Britain run on clean energy by 2030.
If you're cold, put a fucking jumper on.
Meatless Monday
Start a Green School.
Make words represent thoughts, not the other way around.
Be excellent to each other.
Drink more bottled water.
Donate to wikipedia.
Fuck the £30bn high-speed rail plan; just put in more seats, wifi, and power sockets.
Make some major fucking changes.
Do something about it.
Being short of money when there's work to be done is like not having enough inches to build a house.
A green economy is less work, safer, healthier, and more fun.
Get out of the fucking way!
Even hippy food fucks things up. Eat local and seasonal.
Get off your arse and save the world.
Be just a little bit fucking smarter with resources.
Make good things fucking obvious.
Insulate your neighbours house, get laid like a fucking pop-star.
Eat better. Do less.
Do more. Eat less.
Work for the public good for 18 months to earn free university tuition.
If the end does not justify the means - what the fuck can?
Nature is fucking brilliant. Mimic her.
Be a producer, not another fucking consumer.
Together we are un-fucking-stoppable!
Roar.
Don't fucking work so much.
If you're on 40-a-day, don't sell a fucking lung.
Make it simpler.
Make a fucking sandwich.
Share.
Pay your fucking taxes.
Paint a fucking tree.
Let Monsanto and others do what they like with GM.
Turn over a new leaf.
Rip it right-the-fuck up.
Stop banking with RBS.
Tell the fucking truth.
<span class="strike">Get</span> Make a fucking job.
Get some fucking perspective.
10:10:10
Don't live for the weekend.
Walk.
Take the fucking piss.
Spread the fucking word!
Saving energy doesn't cost money.
Next time, don't fucking bail out shit we know to be broken.
Label genetically modified food.
Use the next 74 months fucking wisely.
Use less fucking stuff.
Throw fuckloads of money at algae research.
Stop building fucking roads. You know?
Plant some fucking trees.